Words can’t describe how I feel right now. I’m in a huge black void, there’s nothing but emptiness. And all I want is to take a break from the world and its mundane matters. All I want is to be surrounded by vast nothingness until I’m ok. Like deep diving diving in the ocean. With all my senses numbed and I hear nothing but my breathing. That’s what I want right now.

We didn’t make any promises, we didn’t have any expectations. Yet, nothing stays as light as may be in the beginning. And even without expectations, you still hope for the best, you even trick yourself into believing that best possible outcome will happen. But then things get too complicated. And we’re in an era where convenience trumps complication. Bold statements seem to be a relic from the past. If there’s even a slight chance of getting hurt, many of us don’t seem to be ready for the dare. And before something has even begun, it’s s the end.

Does no one read books any more? How come that everyone’s trying to play things safe? And what’s the point in that, after all? The great loves are the crazy ones. (Thank you, Blair.) What would we even read if Goethe, Austen, Verlaine etc. had decided that love has to be easy and convenient?
Nothing worth having is easy to get. So why are we so eager to blow things off when it comes to love? Is it fear? Is it a lack of courage? Maybe both?

No one wants to be hurt, of course. But does that mean that we have to be cautious with everything? What happened to the All-in-or-out-mentality? Why aren’t people willing to take risks anymore? In the end, you can never know how things will turn out. Even if you’re happy for 10 years, it won’t guarantee happiness for the next 10 years to come.

So all it takes is a leap of faith and some courage to make things work. And yes, you may get hurt in the process. But is it that important when there’s so much more to gain?

And until you decide, I’ll be here in my ocean bubble.